I want to tell you parents something about children’s holiday needs because I really get kids. I am pretty much a kid myself, as a lot of you know.
If your kids are facing the holidays without a “whole” family you have to try to understand the sadness and worries that they have.
Sometimes a family isn’t “whole” because someone has passed. Sometimes the reason can be that a parent is away from home for the holidays or sometimes it can be because of a divorce. You need to understand that the first time without a “whole” family is the hardest but even after that it is still hard.
Children’s Holiday Needs
There are a few things that you can to help your children’s holiday needs do so that things will go better. A good start is to ask them to share their concerns and as they do, really listen. Listen to what they say and pay attention to what they don’t say too!
Kids often hold back from sharing their feelings because they don’t want to add more sadness to the situation. It helps so much to have a parent or parents who let kids know that their children’s holiday needs and what they are feeling is okay and in fact expected and very normal. When parents listen and are understanding, kids feel better. That’s the truth!
It’s okay if you are sad about your “damaged” family situation but please for the sake of your kids, don’t be selfish about it. Think of children’s holiday needs this Christmas Season. They need your help. It’s a great idea to try to make new traditions that will help you and your kids feel better about the different family situation. Let’s say that you always celebrated in a certain way, try to think of a new and different way to celebrate. Maybe inviting other people to celebrate with you could help everyone feel better..
Another really good thing to do is try to involve your kids in the decisions about what you will do as a family to celebrate the holidays. It’s always a good idea for kids to be able to have their friends with them so put out an invitation or say the door is open for all of their friends to visit or celebrate with your family.
If you have any questions just ask. I have a lot of parents and kids who have helped me to be aware of new and different ways to celebrate.
Everyone needs help sometimes and that’s okay! Sometimes parents or teachers can help. Other times it can be friends you know or friends you get to know that can help. Everyone needs help especially if we feel different or can’t do something that the other kids can do or do better. Sometimes everyone needs help just because! I learned that it’s okay to ask for help and it’s even okay to accept help from others when I don’t ask. After all help can really make us feel like others care about our well being. Being alone when we feel sad doesn’t make things better. In fact it usually makes us feel worse. Look at this picture of me in my red wagon. Will I be able to go anyplace if someone doesn’t help me? I don’t think so!
Look at my new friend Pedro. He was feeling very sad because he couldn’t get the basketball to go in the basket. He had never played basketball before so he wasn’t good at getting it in the basket like the kids who shot hoops their whole lives. I told him not to worry. I told him that everyone needs help sometimes… even me! I told him that I couldn’t get the ball in the basket either because I couldn’t throw a ball. I could only play fetch.
A little while later, Pedro met his new best friend. His name is Alex and he told Pedro that he couldn’t get the basketball to go in the hoop very often either. Then he told Pedro that he was really good at playing the guitar. Pedro stopped crying and he told Alex that he always wanted to learn how to play the guitar. Alex told him that he would teach him and asked him if he wanted to come to his house after school one day. Pedro was so happy.
So now you may be wondering if I am still in my red wagon just waiting for someone to come and pull it for me. Well… Guess what? Everyone needs help sometimes so I barked loudly and shouted. “Hey Sally, please come and help me.” Sally came and started to pull the wagon. She said, “Don’t worry Rugby. Everyone needs help sometimes… even me!”
I am your friend Rugby Jones and don’t you ever forget it!