Tag: Kindness

Bullied? Me Too!

bulliedBullied? Me too! To everyone who has been bullied, I get what it feels like. I get that all their mean words and jokes make us feel sad.  Being bullied is the pits. Here is the thing that you need to remember: Bullies are losers and those of us who are different are winners because we have had to overcome a lot. We can show the ones who bullied us that we are proud of our differences and let them know that their unkindness won’t bring us down. At least it won’t for very long but we won’t tell them that part.

This is what happened to me. A lot of kids made fun of me and bullied me. They laughed because I was different. You see, I am a Pembroke Welsh Corgi and Pembroke Welsh Corgis don’t have tails like other dogs. So, what? I think having no tail is pretty cool, don’t you? (When you look at a Pembroke Welsh Corgi from behind, you will see just how adorable we are.) They also bullied me because I couldn’t run and jump and play like the other dogs. They said, “What good is a dog that can’t play fetch? You are no good.” Well, I showed them. And I’ll tell you how.

Guess what? My human mom got me a wheelchair and it is the best wheelchair in the whole world. I named my wheelchair Zoomie because it is so special. Don’t you like it when special things like wheelchairs have names? I sure do.bullied

Now that I have Zoomie, I can run and play and even play fetch. In fact, I can go very fast! Sometimes I go even faster than the other dogs and that is way cool. After I got Zoomie, I went up to one of the kids who bullied me and dropped my ball in front of him. “What’s the matter?” I asked. “Are you afraid that I can play fetch just as well as your dog? Go on, throw it and watch me run.”

When the bully threw the ball, I got it every time. After that, I went up to him and asked, “Don’t you feel bad that you made fun of me? If you don’t feel bad, you should because I am a very cool dude of a dog. And you need to learn that being kind is way cooler that being mean. The kids who are liked the most are the kind ones. Nobody likes bullies.”

If you want to know more about me, you can find my books on Amazon. The first is for older kids and it is The “Tail” of Rugby Jones – A Rascal’s Journey from Disability to Ability and the second one is a rhyming book for younger kids titled The Diary of a Different Dog – Rugby Jones.   They are both pretty amazing if I do say so myself! Oh, by the way… in case you didn’t know, I am Rugby Jones!

 

Stop Bullying – Empathy
Stop Bullying – Empathy

Stop Bullying. If children learn at a young age the wonderment of empathy, bullying will not become part of their lives.

Do any of us understand what it means to be bullied? Maybe we remember being made fun of on the playground or at recess. Some of us were belittled about our grades or achievements. But in today’s world do we really understand what it feels like to be bullied?

Try to empathize with this boy. Someone begins to degrade his character. At first, people don’t seem to pay much attention. Then the he (the target) makes some mistake just like all people make mistakes. But this is different because he is the target. Everything changes. In a healthy world, those who were affected by the mistake would let him  know with constructive criticism. Then he could make amends and make sure that the mistake doesn’t happen again.

Stop Bullying

In a world where kindness, empathy, forgiveness and understanding are not present, the scenario is different. The bully can take a grain of truth and twist it so that those who witnessed the mistake will more easily believe the bully. Then is when a successful assassination of the target’s character takes place.

The target begins to see changes in the people around him. At first the changes are minor and he wonders if he is imagining it and brushes the thoughts away. Some people ask questions and innocently the target answers not realizing that his words will be twisted and used against him.

With the internet and teenagers, the damage is magnified. A text, an email, a post or a conversation can be passed along with great speed. The bully began solo but then more and more get on the “band wagon” and work with one goal in mind. They want to hurt the target for some reason.

To be continued.

 

Empathy: Feelings

empathyEmpathy! Feelings! The explanation of feelings helps to teach empathy and instill kindness in children. Kids can be mean! And the best way to teach them kindness is to help them see how others feel.

A little girl who comes to school wearing pretty and expensive clothes makes an unkind remark to a little girl who doesn’t wear that type of clothes. Why? Because her parents can’t afford them or she doesn’t feel comfortable in them.

Sympathy and empathy are not the same thing. Children can be sympathetic when they view a situation through their own eyes and or experiences.

In contrast, empathy requires that a person has the ability to “step outside” of himself or herself. That person must enter the “internal” world of another person. When this happens, a person can experience the other’s emotions from that person’s vantage point.

Sometimes situations, events or people can jump start a child’s ability to empathize. When children’s hearts are touched, often they automatically react with empathy. When empathy comes into play, a child’s attachment to himself or herself takes a “back seat” to trying to help. The following video tells it all.

When The Best Of Us Steps Up, Our Nation Stands A Little Taller…Share this…Credit to: Canadian Tire

Posted by Most Viral Web on Friday, February 17, 2017

Empathy! Feelings!

In the picture above, the two children that Rugby is speaking to must be guided into a state of empathy if they don’t arrive at that state naturally. Maybe the little girl in the dress has been told that how someone dresses reflects her value. Maybe she has been taught that she is pretty too often and she begins to equate what she has and how she dresses with who she is. As young as she is, she may have become vain and self important.

Hence, an approach might be to ask her how she would feel if her parents could no longer purchase expensive clothes for her. What if she had to go to school in clothes like the other girl is wearing? How would she react if kids made fun of her and her clothes? Would she feel better if someone tried to understand how she is feeling and say or do things that might help her feel better?

Finally, a parent or teacher… or dog friend might tell a child how proud he or she will be if this child shows kindness and acceptance of the little girl who is so sad.  Honest praise goes a long way!

Don’t Go Near Him…Something Is Wrong With Him

don't be afraidDon’t Go Near Him

One day when I went to the pet supply store to get dog food, I took Rugby with me. It was a rainy day and there were very few people in the store. As always, Rugby was scoping out everything at his eye level. I was focused on my errand and we were walking in that direction when I heard people talking.

I heard a child say, “Mommy look at that doggie in the wheelchair.” Then I heard a woman’s voice saying, “Don’t go near him. There is something wrong with him. Let’s just go the other way. No. You can’t pet him. Something is wrong with him.” This was not the first time something like this happened.

It was almost like Rugby was telling himself what to do, “If they can’t come to me, I’ll go to them.”

At that moment, I felt Rugby pulling me down the aisle and around the corner to the next aisle where the children and their mother were. I saw the mother put her hands on her children’s shoulders and hold them. Rugby pulled me right over to them and then barked. It wasn’t a loud bark. It was more like a “woof.”

The little girl looked at her mother and asked her, “Mommy, can’t we pet him please?”  I don’t know if the mother was embarrassed or just confused but she still held their shoulders and said nothing. “Mommy, can we?”

I decided that I needed to put my two cents in so I said, “It’s okay. They can pet him. They won’t catch anything.” She gave me a questioning look and I told her that I knew that she was concerned and that Rugby wouldn’t hurt her children in any way, quite the contrary.

She released her hold on the children as if to tell them that they could pet him. I explained that Rugby had been in an accident and that he needed the wheelchair because of his paralysis.

As the children and Rugby interacted happily, she and I talked. When we were ready to say good bye, she told her children something that I will never forget.

“Emily and Alex, don’t ever be afraid of anyone who is different from you. Try to understand what they are going through and be kind because that is how you want to be treated.”

What a lesson those children learned on that day. What lessons are you teaching your children?

Dogs: Holiday Opinions

Dogs have opinionsDogs have opinions about the holidays.

You may be wondering why a dog has an opinion about such things. Well, I’ll tell you. Dogs are smart. Dogs see happiness and they see sadness. They see kindness and they see hostility. Dogs see pain and grief and they see and they see joy. There are even some dogs who watch TV and see what is happening all over the world.

Guess what? Not only do dogs see these things but they feel them too. Dogs have are very tuned into the people they love and what happens to them. That’s why I have an opinion and that’s why it’s important that I share it with you. There are somethings that are disrupting this holiday season and I know how to fix some of them. My solution centers on kindness and the Golden Rule.

Because everyone is different, everyone values different things. That’s why life will get better when each one of us becomes more understanding, more sympathetic, more concerned and more loving. Miracles can begin with the efforts and actions of all of us.

There is world unrest and national unrest and it’s time to change that… one person, one family, one school, and one nation at a time. It’s time to be good and do good. So as difficult as it may be, we must begin to see things differently so that the future will be all that we want it to be.

Because of that, race, religion, physical ability, political view, color of skin, amount of wealth or lack of wealth, ethnicity or any other difference should be accepted as forms of diversity. Guess what? Diversity is powerful and diversity is everywhere! We need to embrace our own diversity and the diversity of others.

Dogs Have Opinions

So now back to my solution. The way I see it, The Golden Rule is a simple one. Just treat everyone the way you want to be treated.

The Dalai Lama said it best!

“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion… Every religion emphasizes human improvement, love, respect for others, sharing other people’s suffering. On these lines, every religion had more or less the same viewpoint and the same goal.”

(The Golden Rule or ethic of reciprocity is a moral maxim or principle of altruism found in nearly every human culture and religion, suggesting it is related to a fundamental human nature.)

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